Funeral Service for Lydia Macrae
On
Monday 1st August 2016
At
Warriston Crematorium Cloister



Entry music: Tales from Vienna Woods by Strauss.

Light candle:
Preamble:

Good afternoon and welcome to our service giving thanks and praise for the life of Lydia McRae Macrae. Before we start our ceremony today, Lydia’s son, David, would like to say a few words.

David: short speech about unconventional nature of the service and an explanation why.

Lydia McRae Harkess
Lydia McRae Baker
Lydia McRae Macrae

A small woman with a big personality, was:

Widowed twice
Mum to 3 children
Granny to 7 grandchildren
Great Granny to 4 great-grandchildren

Mum knew her mind, and did not hold back in letting others know what she thought, and that applies to today's proceedings.

Mum made it clear to me and my sisters that she wanted her funeral to be a celebration and she planned the key aspects of it – and what Mum wanted, Mum usually got.

Mum loved classical music and in particular the music of Strauss. New Year's day was not complete until she had watched the annual broadcast of Strauss music live from Vienna.

She chose a number of Strauss waltzes to be played today. In particular she was insistent that she depart to a rousing rendition of the Radetzky March. So when the time comes, I would ask you all to help fulfil her final, somewhat unconventional, wish and clap along to the Radetzky March by Johan Strauss by way of a final goodbye to Lydia.

The rest of of today's proceedings are more conventional and start with a hymn that recognises the role the sea played in both her husband's lives.

Please stand.

Hymn: Will your anchor hold (Boy’s Brigade)

Introduction:
A rousing hymn, I am sure you will agree, to open up a service celebrating Lydia’s life.

Lydia was a strong willed lady. Her diminutive stature belied her strength of character and her determination to always get her own way. A creative, unconventional and warm woman, she lived by her own values. She was widowed twice in her life and although her losses must have been very difficult to bear, she steadfastly moved forward and adjusted to her new circumstances.
Her death from cancer at the age of 89 on the 24th July has left a large hole in her family’s life. As David mentioned, Lydia was prepared for her death. Today, her wishes are being honoured, just as she would have expected.

Lydia was not a religious woman. It is not known whether she had a belief in a life beyond this, she was however a very practical lady, and would not have wanted there to be too much sentiment over her passing. Her children discovered that she had emptied drawers so that they did not have to, thus minimising the impact of clearing her house. A final act of great love.

Our ceremony today will last about 25 minutes. We will hear about Lydia’s life as recounted by the family along with some examples of her zest for living and as you have heard you all will be expected to be active participants by clapping along to the Radetzky March.

My name is Loretta Dunn. I am a funeral celebrant and I am honoured to be officiating at Lydia’s service today.

Life story:
Lydia was born in Newington, Edinburgh, a younger sibling for her brother Stanley, on 22nd August 1926 to Lydia McRae Harkess and David Harkess. Lydia would have been 90 years old in 3 weeks. The family can remember that grandad Harkess had lost an arm during WW1 which meant that his previous trade as a shoe maker was no longer an option for him. He adapted well to his disability becoming a civil servant, but more importantly, a great bowler. Lydia took up the sport later in life at competition level, honouring a skill that obviously ran in her family.

Educated in Preston Street primary school then James Clark Secondary, she was very much a Newington girl. She served an apprenticeship with Turnbull and Wilson learning her trade as a dressmaker making military and nurses uniforms. These early skills were to be further enhanced by a move to Mutries, the theatrical costume makers, where her skills as a dressmaker were expanded to include making detailed costumes for productions at the King’s Theatre including pantomime dame dresses for Stanley Baxter.

Much later these skills would once again be put to the test when Janet asked mum to help with costumes for the children at the nursery where she worked, or when she made Musselburgh Fishwives costumes for a fancy dress or the time that Lydia and Caroline were nearly lost under yards of netting for a 1950’s themed party. All made with love and exquisitely intricate detail. Her reputation as a seamstress was legendary.

Perhaps one of her proudest projects was Janet’s wedding dress. Of course, the bridesmaid’s dresses and the page boy’s kilt were all hand-made too.
Lydia’s last family wedding was in July last year when she managed to stay up until 1am dancing and generally keeping up with the young ones in the family.
Lydia loved dancing. She followed the Edinburgh dance hall traditions of the 40’s and 50’s meeting her future husband at the Palais, in Fountainbridge.
The ballrooms and dance halls were where young people met in those days, and one Alexander Lewis Baker, better known as Alec or Sandy, was a handsome young Petty Officer in the Royal Navy. They were married on 26th February 1951.
Lydia was guaranteed that all her decorating needs would be met, as Alec’s peacetime job was as a painter and decorator, a role he also fulfilled in the Navy by hanging over the edge of the ship painting it Battleship Grey.

She loved to draw plans for changing the layout of her house and was always moving and shifting furniture around, and Alex was kept busy redecorating the house to match Lydia's latest plans

The babies arrived soon after with Caroline in 1952, David in 1955 and Janet in 1959. The family settled in East Claremont Street where they can recall many happy times. One of the neighbours had the only TV and telephone in the street. The children were allowed to watch TV there. They lived there until 1972 shortly before Broughton High school moved to Craigleith.

Lydia continued with her sewing, joining the staff of the Royal Victoria Hospital where she once again set to work adjusting nurses uniforms for the ever changing nursing staff.

For years the family holidays were taken in Burntisland, where they travelled by train, however, when Alec passed his driving test, their horizon’s opened up to more exotic locations such as Scarborough, London, Cornwall and North Wales. The family recalls that holidays were spent in holiday camps, very popular at the time, so that Lydia and Alec could continue their shared love of ballroom dancing.. At the age of 57 while dancing with his beloved wife at the Tartan Club in Edinburgh, Alec died of a heart attack on the dance floor, leaving Lydia a widow at age 50.
Lydia had to adjust to her new life and despite being devastated by the loss of Alec, she gradually started to pick up the pieces of her life. She took the bus up to Beauly, Inverness-shire, regularly to visit her cousin, Amy with whom she was great pals. During one of these visits, which of course involved dancing, she met John Macrae at the British Legion Club. John also had a naval background including a period of time as a sub-mariner and going to the Falklands after the 1982 war there with the Merchant Navy.

Lydia moved up to Inverness to be with John and they were married in 1987, hence her name, McRae after her mother and her new married name Macrae. Her life with John was full and very busy. They were involved in running dance classes in a community centre in Inverness, they loved to travel, including visiting her brother Stanley who had moved to Australia many years before and of course, they shared a passion for bowling. They won many trophies together, for both indoor and outdoor bowling. Life was good.

They enjoyed 20 blissful years of married life before John died in 2006 of lung cancer leaving Lydia alone once more. She moved back to Edinburgh in 2009 to be close to her family and being the resilient lady that she was, started again.
Lydia was always smartly dressed and although by then she had retired she continued to sew altering the clothes that she had bought for herself, adding her unique signature to the pieces and she was kept busy by taking in, letting out or generally adjusting clothes for family friends and neighbours.
Lydia was a very modern woman who learned to use her tablet to order goods online, via “Mr Google”. She is fondly remembered by the family, for renaming the search engine and for calling broadband “broadway”.

She did not see age as a barrier to learning new skills and appreciated the wonders of present day technology. She even refused to consider going into a nursing home because there was no wi-fi.

Lydia was also an exceptional knitter. You will have noted the wool coffin today when you placed your clematis on top. Lydia would have approved of the practical and craft orientated nod to her tremendous knitting skills.

Keith described Lydia as the best mother in law anyone could ever have, but she was also a “cool granny” to her grandchildren, who also called her jet-setting granny because she was always off somewhere.

She learned to swim and drive and was taken to Murrayfield to appreciate rugby in her 80’s.

She joined Caroline’s walking group on trips to foreign countries. She would see them off at the start of the walk and meet them at the end after having taken the local bus, she was fearless.

She even went up on a gondola in Courcheval during a family skiing trip and sat in the café at the top watching her precious brood having fun. There is a photo of her holding the skis in one hand and her handbag in the other.

At the tender age of 85 she went up in a microlight with grandson Mark, and came back to earth declaring that a parachute jump would be her next challenge.

Lydia had never been ill in her life but a prognosis of cancer last September, informed her that she was living on borrowed time. She remained independent until just a few days before she died peacefully in St Columba’s Hospice, even managing to finish knitting her final Ross County hat for Finlay her newest greatgrandson.
A devoted wife, mother, sister, grandmother, great-grandmother cousin and friend we now honour her last request to enjoy the Radetzky March by clapping along as a final farewell to a remarkable lady.

Radetzky March: Johann Strauss

Committal:
Please be upstanding for the committal.

In this, the final act in our farewell ceremony we say goodbye to Lydia.
We have been remembering with affection and gratitude the life of Lydia and recalling what a loving, happy and compassionate woman she has been.
So, in sorrow, but with deep love and affection we now commit Lydia’s body to its end, to be transformed into the ultimate elements of the Universe.

We rejoice that she lived.
We took delight in her friendship.
We cherish our memories of her.
With love we now leave her in peace.
With respect we bid her farewell.
Turn to coffin
Lydia, thank you for all you gave. You lived your life with integrity, loyalty and honesty, and we honour and love you for that. You made a difference.
Blow out candle
Please be seated.

We will have a minute of silent contemplation to reflect on how Lydia touched your life.

Final words:
On behalf of the family I would like to thank you all for coming here today and sharing in this celebration of Lydia’s life and for all the warmth, sensitivity and support you have given them these last few days. Lydia herself, requested that you are all very welcome to come back to her home at 9/1 Blackie Road for tea, sandwiches (or something stronger) and sharing fond memories of one of life’s characters.

There will be a collection for St Columba’s Hospice Forget-me-not appeal when you leave, if you would like to make a donation.

She is gone, but she has left a legacy of smiles, amusing anecdotes and lots of Ross County knitted hats.

Caroline, David and Janet, you will miss your mum’s physical presence but her influence will never die. To all her grandchildren and great-grandchildren, she has been a shining example of the qualities required to be an excellent grandmother.
Go forward with your own lives now and remember her fondly. Speak of her often and ensure that you copy her philosophy of living life to the maximum no matter how old you are, as age is no barrier to exploring new experiences as Lydia so ably demonstrated.

We will close our ceremony today with the following words:

Don’t Cry for me
Don't cry for me now I have died, for I'm still here I'm by your side,
My body's gone but my soul's is here, please don't shed another tear,
I am still here I'm all around, only my ashes lie in the ground.
I am the snowflake that kisses your nose,
I am the frost, that nips your toes.
I am the sun, bringing you light,
I am the star, shining so bright.
I am the rain, refreshing the earth,
I am the laughter, I am the mirth.
I am the bird, up in the sky,
I am the cloud, that's drifting by.
I am the thoughts, inside your head,
While I'm still there, I can't be dead.

Exit:
Blue Danube: Strauss